Blades Of Grass
by The Golden Goose
Summary: You know something is wrong in ur life if you'd kill to stay home and your best friend is a peanut called sophia ... Ginny doesnt realize this ... But she eventually figured something was wrong when she got paranoid about being stalked by a ladybird ...
1. Home

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Tuesday, 12 November 2002****

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**A/N: ***Makes incomprehensible noises* for the last 3 weeks I have seen a ladybird everyday … its freaking me out and I'm starting to think that it might be the same one … be afraid … be ***very*** afraid … of … the … LADYBIRD!

**Summery:** Funny how sometimes two wrongs make a right. Ginny knew that something was wrong with her family but she was too young to understand. Now, several years later, the missing link from her life visits her, but does she recognise who it is? And whom will she turn to for comfort? When you're young you don't understand what your feeling, but you cant learn a lot about feelings within a couple of months, and when you think back you feel like an idiot.

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                                                            **Blades of Grass and Ladybirds**

~ Home

The wind whipped through the grass and sent it bobbing up and down, up and down around Ginny's legs and toes, over her head and brush across her eyes. Ginny liked it out here, if she lay very still and close her eyes all she could smell was the sweet sent of the honey suckle bush near the fence and all she could hear was the buzzing of bees and the slight chirping of distant birds. She could stay that way for hours without moving an inch and eventually the whole world would forget she was there, the grass was so tall the it would just swallow her and it seemed that all her problems would just melt away along with her existence.

A shadow swept across the sky and blocked out the warm sun kissing her face. Ginny snapped her eyes open suddenly just in time to see the flutter of white owl wings sweep towards the house. She sighed in relief. As long as it wasn't one of her brothers she was fine. She looked at the grass towering over her face and smiled as a ladybird crawled to the end of a blade of grass, weighing it down till the grass almost touched her nose. Ginny crinkled her nose at the ladybird and the ladybird pulled a clueless face that only ladybirds seem to be able to pull. Ginny smiled. She felt so warm and contented. Nobody should be feeling this happy. Completely forgetting the ladybird dangling an inch above her head, Ginny sat up quickly (sending the ladybird flying a metre before it remembered that it had wings and flew into the nearby strawberry patch, where it started nibbling at a fairly large strawberry then flew away. The strawberry was then eaten and choked on by a rabbit, which collapsed outside a gnome hole and was eaten for breakfast by a family of 4 gnomes.) And looked around, taking in her surroundings once again. She decided it then and there, she wouldn't rather be anywhere else in the world … home, 'the burrow', its where she belongs, and she'd have to be strapped to a speeding locomotive before she left it again (unless it was for school), everywhere else is just too dangerous.

She stood and waded through the waist length grass towards the house. Ginny stepped through the door to a scene of absolute chaos. Fred and George were starting their last year at Hogwarts (and they were taking advantage of the fact that it would be their last chance to add to this chaos), Ron was in his 6th year and his two best friends, Harry and Hermione, had stayed at The Burrow for the last 2 weeks of the holidays, and Ginny was starting her 5th year. That was the scary thing. Her *5th* year. It was all catching up to her too fast. She was now 15. *15*! She remembered like it was just yesterday that she was standing on platform 9 ¾, waiting anxiously for the day that *she* would be leaving for Hogwarts with her brothers.

But that day had been and gone, along with many days after that. Now she found herself wishing to be a 1st year again. Wishing to be 'innocent little Ginny' again. But you can't change the past. Well … not without consequences. Consequences that she was just not able to deal with right now.

"Ginny!" her mother called, "Are you packed and ready yet?"

"Yes mum … and my trunk is in the car too …"

"Good girl, can you go wait outside while the rest of us finish getting our stuff?" her mother said while trying to battle away a wand that had suddenly sprung to life the moment she touched it and started to just get in the way.

Ginny nodded obediently and found a nice rock outside to sit on. What she didn't notice was that a ladybird had crawled up her arm and was now nicely snuggled in her breast pocket.

**~*~**

Soon enough everyone was in the car, owls, cats, backpacks, trunks, snacks and all. Ginny just sat in silence and looked longingly out the window as the burrow disappeared out of view and was replaced by trees slinking out into the distance. She sighed.

All through the drive Ginny tuned in and out of the conversations going on around her, but none of it was worth listening to.

"I'm going to try out for the Quiddich team this year as …"

"Have you finished your transfiguration homework on the …"

"You should see that new broom in Diagon …"

"Do you like the new collar I got for Crookshanks? …"

_'They're all so boring! I wish I had a friend that I could talk to …I mean … Fred and George have each other to talk to and now that Ron has Harry and Hermione to talk to I'm the odd one out …'_

Ginny sighed again. _'Just think … soon this will all be over and I wont even think twice about it later …'_

And soon enough it was over. Her, Fred, George, Harry, Ron, Hermione and her parents were all standing on platform 9 ¾ and she wasn't even thinking twice about that car drive. She pecked her mother on the cheek and got on the Hogwarts Express as fast as she could. She found an empty compartment and sat with her head on her knees, trying to cover her face as much as possible with her hands.

A moment passed before she felt the grateful movement of the train. Another moment passed before she realized how lonely she was and how long this train ride was going to be. 

'Just think, soon this ride will be over and I won't even think twice about it later …' 

That's where she was wrong, for, right at that moment, the door to the compartment slid open to reveal a boy who she recognised on sight. He was 16, around 6" high, had a great body with silver hair and eyes to match.

"Mind if … uh … mind if I sit?" Draco asked

_'Scanning for sarcasm ... It's clean! Go for it!'_

"Uh … sure …" Ginny replied, making eye contact but looking away again after she saw that he was staring right at her.

Draco sat across from her and sat looking at her. Ginny knew he was looking at her but didn't want to show that she did. Ginny looked out the window.

"Hi." Draco said finally.

"Hey" Ginny said and glanced at Draco awkwardly.

"Do I know you from somewhere?" Draco asked.

_'Get a clue!'_

"Well … I don't know … maybe? We *do* go to the same school … Maybe you've seen me around?" Ginny replied nervously.

"Maybe … I don't see how I could have missed you … I'm Draco, by the way." Draco said in his most charming voice and took her right hand, planting a soft kiss on her knuckle.

_'Is he for real?!?'_

Ginny took her hand back, but not too quickly, _'Does he seriously not know who I am?!? Maybe I could play with him a bit? Gosh he has sexy eyes … wait! We're from completely different worlds!'_

"I'm Virginia. Pleased to meet you Draco." Ginny said then tore her eyes away from his to look out the window again.

They sat in silence for longer than a moment. For a while Ginny forgot he was there and started to doze off. Who wouldn't? She was watching the scenery dash past, there were dark trees planted against a dark, cloudy sky, outside the train was freezing cold and inside the compartment was toasty warm. There were only the sounds of the train moving steadily along the old track and the distant murmuring of distant students, inside the compartment was silent. Her eyes were getting heavy and she closed them absentmindedly. She was almost unconscious when she heard the food trolley approach her compartment and snapped her eyes suddenly open and sat bolt upright. Draco looked at her curiously just before the kindly witch opened the compartment.

"Want anything from the trolley, dears?"

"Uh … no thanks … I'm set." Ginny mumbled quietly.

Draco stood and made his order then sat down with his arms full of items from the trolley. Ginny continued to stare out the window, only looking away from it to glance at a packet of Bertie Botts Every Flavour Beans that Draco had set down on the seat beside him. Ginny absolutely loved jelly beans … if there was one thing that she loved just as much as jelly beans it was watermelon flavoured lip gloss … but when it came to Bertie Botts Every Flavour Beans, Ginny was the champion. She only ever seems to get the good flavours, like watermelon, strawberry, cherry, watermelon, chocolate, caramel, watermelon, lemon, grape and did I mention watermelon?

Ginny glanced at the jelly beans for what seemed like the10th time when Draco surprised her by picking them up and throwing them to her. She caught them and looked at him quizzically.

"I saw you looking at them … they're jelly beans … you can have them." Draco said and Ginny smiled at another human being for the first time since the holidays began. She hadn't smiled at anyone all holidays. She had just taken to sitting in silence and sending 'hate vibes' to everyone. It seemed that Draco had taken to doing it too. He probably wasn't aware of it, but he was sending her hate vibes that very moment.

"Thanks." Ginny said then opened the packet of jellybeans and ate a watermelon flavoured one.

_'He's very observant …'_

**~*~**

"Virginia …" Draco started but was cut off.

"Ginny." She corrected.

"Ginny …" Draco said then tried to smile (tried), "We're not as different as I first thought" Draco leant forward and took her hand.

"I noticed." Ginny said just as the train slowed to a stop, "but I bet you didn't notice that I'm a Weasley."

Draco looked at her in shock as Ginny stood and walked out of the compartment with her cloak in arms.

Ginny stepped out of the train, through the streams of bewildered students and into an empty carriage. Three 2nd year girls that she didn't know also got into the carriage before it took off. Ginny just looked out the window and emitted hate vibes into the carriage so the girls wouldn't attempt to talk to her.

Ginny had completely blocked out the three girls from her little world, but two small words had forced her to give them her full attention to their conversation.

" … Draco Malfoy? He is tomorrows YUM!"

"His eyes are sooo Dreamy!"

"And his hair! I love that look on him!"

"He's so romantic too! Did you see what he gave Katreena for their 5 month?"

"YES! That was so sweet!"

"But did you see his puppy dog face as he got off the train?"

"Aww … poor thing"

"Anyone who turns him down must be insane or something – oh … hi" said one of the girls to Ginny. She hadn't noticed but she was looking at each girl as she spoke and was no longer emitting hate vibes.

_'DAMN IT! I should have kept up those hate vibes … they were working!'_

"Uh … hi" Ginny said then looked out the window again. The girls started a mindless conversation about nail polish for the rest of the ride.

Ginny was in her idea of a living hell. No escape, and three tarts talking about beauty products.

'Just think, soon this ride will be over and I won't even think twice about it later … soon this ride will be over and I won't even think twice about it later …THIS RIDE IS NEVER GOING TO BE OVER!!!' Just as Ginny thought she was going to scream the carriage stopped and Ginny lunged for the door before the 3 girls could even move and almost ran to the great hall. She sidled into the great hall and took a seat at the Gryffindor table. She couldn't help but notice a certain Slytherin enter the hall. 

_'Why do I keep thinking about him? Lust. I'm lusting over him. What is lust anyway? I don't get it … I'm just going to forget him.'_

Easier said than done.

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T.B.C 

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**A/N:** Good? Bad? Continue? Yes? No? Maybe? Oh I wish someone would put me out of my misery! I have run this through spelling/grammar check but you cant rely on computers to pick up on everything, and my grammar isn't all that good … so if there are any mistakes then please tell me and be kind enough not to abuse me about it … and I will fix any speeling or gremmer errors (don't mind me … I'm mildly insane … -^) Anyhoo … if you cant tell … if I had one wish I would ask for a watermelon flavoured jelly bean the size of my fist … Muahahaha!!! |^-^|

**_~The Golden Goose_**

**__**

~MWAH!

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	2. Misery Guts

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Tuesday, 3 December 2002****

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**A/N: **I've been keeping track … I'm still seeing ladybirds … it's a bit freaky … and I'm not lying either … anyhoo … if you've been waiting for this, than sorry it's taken a while … I've had to wait till I was in a shitty mood again or it would turn a bit silly …

**Summery:** Funny how sometimes two wrongs make a right. Ginny knew that something was wrong with her family but she was too young to understand. Now, several years later, the missing link from her life visits her, but does she recognise who it is? And whom will she turn to for comfort? When you're young you don't understand what your feeling, but you cant learn a lot about feelings within a couple of months, and when you think back you feel like an idiot.

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                                                            **Blades of Grass and Ladybirds**

~ Misery Guts

The Feast ran like clockwork. Sorting, Dumbledore says a few words, food, and then it's all over. Ginny sat in silence through the whole of it. It's not that she was being unsociable … well … it kind of was … but the fact that her only friend was a peanut that she carried around in her pocket didn't help. (A/N: SHUT UP BEC! TREVOUR IS COOL! And I think I should share the knowledge of how friendly peanuts are with everyone.)

There weren't as many students as there usually were. Since Voldemort's rising more and more students were being taken out of the school by their parents. At this point, around 20% of the students had been withdrawn from the school to be in the 'safety' of their homes.

Ginny sighed into her barely-touched food and stood awkwardly. A couple of eyes glanced in her direction as she slowly dragged her feet over to the door and exited the Great Hall. Ginny pushed her ear up to the door and listened intently to the happy chattering of the students on the other side and, for the first time ever, wished she were one of them. Its not that she was purposely left out or pick on by anyone at all … but sometimes you feel like being forgotten about, and others you don't. This moment was when she was hoping that someone that cared would walk out and ask her what was wrong, and wouldn't accept 'no' as an answer. But it seems that the world just goes on without her even when she didn't want it to.

Ginny moved out to the lake. It wasn't raining outside like it usually was. There was even a slight crack in the clouds that let in a single ray of moonlight that reflected from the lakes glassy surface. She found a nice flat rock that she could sit on without getting a wet bottom on the moist grass.

It was an empty place that was there, in her soul, since before she could remember that put her in these moods. She didn't know what it was, but something was missing, and it scared her that she could miss something that she couldn't remember.

"Why cant life be as easy as it is on TV?" Ginny yelled at herself.

**~*~**

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Ginny blinked to life the next morning. It took her a while to take in her surroundings, but when she did she had to gasp for breath. She was still outside. She was hidden well from everything around her, but still outside. She rubbed her eyes a couple of times till she could open them fully then stepped outside. Her vision was blurred slightly and her hair was flyaway … but she needed to get to the Great Hall for breakfast, so she just ran straight there … who cares what she looks like?

She took her usual seat at the Gryffindor table and just looked at the food. She realized that she wasn't hungry at all. She actually felt kind of sick. Odd.

Ginny blinked a few times before nudging the person next to her (who happened to be 3rd year by the name of Tony McMillan) and asking, "What's the password … I missed it last night."

The kid just gawked at her, gathered his things together and walked out of the hall a quickly as possible without breaking into a run.

Ginny glanced around the room to see if anyone was laughing at her … no … nobody seemed to notice … Ginny then stood, found her brother and got the password from him. She then proceeded to stomp out of the Great Hall, into her dorms and stand in front of the mirror to see the damage that sleeping outside on a freezing cold night with nothing but her school robes for cover had caused to her appearance.

Just what she thought … she looked exactly how she felt … which isn't saying much at all. 

Shithouse.

Ginny only shared the dorm room with one other girl, who was currently at breakfast. It was a comforting thought that nobody was going to walk in on her too soon. She sat on the bed with her head in her hands.

_'I can't stand this for much longer!'_

**_~*~_**

Classes were as usual. Besides the fact that there were only 5 other Gryffindors, 6 Hufflepuffs, 5 Ravenclaws, and 7 Slytherins and they all had to share the same class … everything was normal.

First off was D.A.D.A. Ginny took a seat up the back of the class. She didn't like the fact that if anyone sat behind her they'd see her back and she wouldn't know if that were looking at her or not.

"Now, class …" the new defence against the darks arts teacher began, "I am Professor Astora. These days defence against the dark arts is very important … so listen up, and don't miss a beat of what I say because, I assure you, it's all important."

Ginny drifted off. This teacher was very boring. She was tall and gangling with her very grey hair curled up in a tight bun. Her black robes were skin tight around the bust to the knees and very flowing from the knees down and on the sleaves. It looked as if she was trying to look like an older version of Mortisha Adams.

**_~*~_**

_'Dark. Damp. And haunted. **Not** how I wish to spent my afternoon.'_

Classes had been and gone. Nobody seemed to notice her skip lunch and sidle away from dinner early again. She had just lost her appetite lately. No big problem. Ginny was now walking down a deserted hall in the dungeons. She had seen three ghosts in the last hour and ghosts gave her the heevy-geevies! 

She came to a dead end and sat with her back to the wall. 

_'But if this is the only way I can be alone … then so be it!'_

Heaving a book out of her backpack, she settled down to read. The book was _'Falling Leaves'_ by Adeline Yen-Mah. It's a sad story about a muggle woman and her screwed up childhood. It was quite compelling to Ginny about how this lady had gone through the worst and came out on top. Something that probably wouldn't have happened if her childhood weren't as screwed up as it was.

The stonewall was cold and hard on her back and a suit of armour down the hall creaked every now and then as it looked around. Other than that Ginny was quite comfortable with her position and felt safe against the wall at the dead end. Ginny pulled Sophia (Her peanut) out of her pocket and clutched her in her hand and began to be engrossed in her book.

15 minutes later she felt a presence coming toward her down the hall and finally hear the swish of a cloak. She looked up from her book just in time to see a familiar pair of eyes looking down on her.

"I followed you down here … what's wrong?"

"Nothing"

"Doesn't look like nothing"

"Nothing is wrong! Just leave me be!"

"I'm not accepting 'no' as an answer!"

_'This boy is a mind reader!'_

"Why do you want to know so bad?"

"Because I care."

"But why do you care?"

"Because I can relate …"

"How do I know I can trust you?"

"Who else do you have? Besides the peanut?" Draco said as he offered his hand to Ginny. Ginny looked at the boy suspiciously for a moment before putting everything in her bag and standing up.

"You don't know me and you should remember that fact!" Ginny yelled at Draco as she batted away his hand "So before you go around saying you can relate what I'm going through get your facts straight … and don't you _ever_ talk about my peanut!" Very few can say 'don't you ever talk about my peanut' and maintain a threatening demeanour, but this is exactly what Ginny did.

Draco _almost_ flinched at her powerful use of words. He had expected her to just melt at his use of the _'Malfoy charm'_. But he could see the venom in her eyes at his presumption. She stormed away down the hall. Anger seemed to flow off her in waves of fire.

He could have sworn that if he left her for another 5 minutes she would have had a mental break down.

_"Guess she is stronger than she looks" _Draco thought as he smirked down the empty hall that Ginny had just exited.

~There is nothing more trusting than an innocent, but even an innocent should know better than to trust something pure evil.~

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T.B.C 

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**A/N:** I know … it's shorter than the last chapter … but that thing just wrote itself!!! This was harder … indeed … anyhoo … Ginny watches a lot of TV because I say so …

*~* **_IMPORTANT NEWS!_** *~* My beloved peanut and best friend, Trevour, is dead. I got him on 23/10/2002 and he died 5/12/02. He lived for 43 days (1 month, 2 weeks). His neck had gotten so worn through that when I pulled him out of my pocked to show everyone that he was still alive his head fell off. We had a burial for him ("we" being me and my friends John and Steve (the only other people that appreciated Trevour)) and we left some lovely flowers on his grave. Unfortunately, a very butch girl named Elissa Woods dug up his grave while I was in history and squashed his head into very small pieces and gave them to me during lunch (HOW SICK IS THAT!!!). Then she was picking on me when I started crying and I ran away and she is now on my 'to-punch-before-I-finish-school' list … with a cross against her name because she was already on it. And now I hope everyone hates her! Because she's BUTCH! And she made me cry! And making me cry is just wrong! It's like kicking a baby animal just after it was born … its just wrong …

**_~The Golden Goose_**

**__**

~MWAH!

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	3. Disorders

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Wednesday, 19 February 2003

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**A/N:**it hasn't been every day anymore … but I'm still seeing them in an abnormally large amount … sorry its been so long … I'm kinda "cut" … you could say … I may or may not take this down, add more and put it back up … its heaps shorter than the other chapters … but I just cant concentrate …

**Summery:** Funny how sometimes two wrongs make a right. Ginny knew that something was wrong with her family but she was too young to understand. Now, several years later, the missing link from her life visits her, but does she recognise who it is? And whom will she turn to for comfort? When you're young you don't understand what your feeling, but you cant learn a lot about feelings within a couple of months, and when you think back you feel like an idiot.

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**Blades of Grass and Ladybirds**

~ Disorders

Ginny practically flew into her bathroom, slammed the door as hard as she could and locked it. Her amber locks bounced angelically as she stormed over to the toilet, flipped the lid down and sat. She looked out the window blankly for a moment before breaking down completely. Sobbing uncontrollably into her hands, her elbows resting on her knees.

She stayed in this position for longer than a moment before she recovered enough to lift her head and look desperately around the room for a cure to her pain.

And there it was.

On the bench … a small vile. Its clear contents reflected the light, making a mosaic of colours reflect off the bench.

It took her a minute to realise what the vile actually was. She curiously walked over to the bench and stared at the vile for a moment, before picking it up and reading the label. It was just what she thought it was, a potion that one of the girls had left behind.

She screwed the lid off the bottle. The dropper gleamed with the fluid. She tipped her head back and let one single drop land softly on her tong. The liquid was bitter and left her mouth suddenly dry. She chanced a look in the mirror. Her hazel eyes were red and swollen from crying. The top of her hair was flyaway and her normally glowing skin was pale and clammy. The bags under her eyes insisted that she needed sleep.

It took a while … but the feeling finally came. Her stomach clenched, she held her breath and ran to the toilet. She knew what was coming. She hastily pushed the toilet seat up and leaned over the bowl. The water in there was crystal clear and reflected her hazel eyes, making them look large and irregular. Her throat suddenly clenched enough to match her stomach, it burnt as she felt the bile rise up to greet her tonsils. She opened her mouth and let it all flow out. Since there wasn't much in her stomach in the first place, not much came out. Just a thin, orange juice with a few chunks spilled into the toilet and mixed into the clear water, turning it slightly yellowish.

Ginny was mesmerized by the patterns that her vomit made in the water.

"Ginny? Are you all right? What are doing?" a voice called from the back of her mind.

"Yeah … I'll be out in a sec!" Ginny answered, walking over to the toilet and flushing it for effect. She then splashed her face with water, scrubbing it till the mess came off, dried it with a towel and stared at her reflection in the mirror. Her eyes were now dry and her face was flushed from the strain. The bags still screamed for a good nights sleep … but she looked more alive.

_'Why does he make me feel like this?'_

Ginny tried to find herself in the reflection. In failing this she stormed over to the bathroom door and opened it quickly. Nobody was there. Not even a trace, or sign that anyone had been there since she came.

From the bottom of her eye she could have sworn that she saw a flash of red and black on the carpet, but when she tried to focus on it, it was gone.

Ginny just shrugged it off and changed into her worn-out nightie. She then collapsed into her bed, her warm blankets enfolding her and comforting her emptiness. Her last remaining thought was of 'The Burrow' before she fell into the unconsciousness of sleep.

**_~*~_**

**__**

Draco awoke in the morning with a smirk on his face. He had gotten to her. He had made her yell. Hell, he had made her speak in full sentences!

Nothing could compare to the high that he got from making people angry. Sure, some people got angry if you said that they smelt bad. But it was different with her. It wasn't the same satisfaction. But he chose to completely ignore this, and almost leap out of bed.

Down at breakfast she wasn't there. He almost showed his disappointment at this. Almost.

"DraAaco …"

"PaAansy …"

"DraAaco …"

"PaAansy …"

"DraAaco …"

"What do you waAan't?"

"I was just … wondering … if … you wanted to …" pansy started, sugar coating her voice and placing a hand on his upper-thigh, "go out with me …?"

"Now Pansy … as tempting as that sounds …" Draco said with disgust obviously in his eyes and voice, pealing her had from his leg, "I have interests elsewhere. And if you don't mind me saying so … you look like a bulldog."

Pansy recoiled in shock. She hadn't ever been spoken to like this before. She was used to getting her way. She was used to getting any guy she wanted by asking this way. She didn't know what to do. She was confused. And when she's confused, she starts to cry.

Large crocodile tears began to well up in her cinnamon eyes and fall down her cheekbones and drip from her chin to her lap.

"Oh don't cry! It's pathetic!" Draco spat at her through clenched teeth.

Pansy stood and ran out the doors of the Great Hall, bumping into none other than Virginia Weasley. Draco looked over to her hopefully. She glanced at him, but looked away with too much haste to see him give her a small wave. But she did manage to see the smile on his face at Pansy's tears before he noticed she came in.

'He's malevolent … but DAMN he has a nice smile …' 

Ginny sat at her usually spot on the table. She could see Draco between 2 kids' heads. He could see her. But she couldn't decide whether this was a good thing, or bad thing. For breakfast she ate a piece of toast with strawberry jam and a glass of pumpkin juice. Not much. But she wasn't hungry. She was just eating because she thought she should. She felt a lot better about herself since last night.

And she intended to stay good about herself.

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T.B.C 

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**A/N:** I have no idea where I'm going with this … DAMN YOU WRITERS BLOCK! I'm allergic to flames.

**_~The Golden Goose_**

**__**

~MWAH!

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	4. Tears of Despair

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Friday, 11 April 2003

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**A/N:**Has anyone ever has one of those days when everything just seems to go wrong? Feels horrible doesn't it ... but I've just found out that there are days where everything goes right! ^-^ Catch up on sleep. Thanks reviewers!!! I love you all! :D

**Summery:** Funny how sometimes two wrongs make a right. Ginny knew that something was wrong with her family but she was too young to understand. Now, several years later, the missing link from her life visits her, but does she recognise who it is? And whom will she turn to for comfort? When you're young you don't understand what you're feeling, but you can learn a lot about feelings within a couple of months, and when you think back you feel like an idiot.

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**Blades of Grass and Ladybirds**

~ Tears of Despair

Pansy wandered the halls aimlessly, tears blurring her vision. It wasn't every day that this happened to her. Rejection was a completely new feeling to her and she hated its bitter taste, it felt stale in her soul … like a scar that will never fade. Who would have thought that Pansy Parkinson had feelings of her own?

_'What does he mean he has interests elsewhere?'_

She finally stopped to look around the deserted corridor. Nothing was familiar. A suit of armour that she'd never seen before, a painting of a girl with pale skin, curly white-blonde hair, hazel eyes and freckles looked surprised to see her.

A feeling of panic swept over her, smothering her stomach. The ground was covered in a very thick layer of dust and wherever she stepped, however hard it was, didn't seem to even leave a mark on it. The panic grew when she realised that she was hopelessly lost. She didn't remember which way she came and it didn't look like this corridor was ever used.

Pansy collapsed on the floor and did the only thing someone in a dark, musty and dusty corridor would do, she sneezed.

**_~*~_**

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Draco couldn't help but notice that Pansy hadn't attended any of the classes for that day. It wasn't that he cared, he didn't, but he felt this stiffness on the back of his neck whenever he thought about it. Could it be … guilt? No … Draco Malfoy didn't feel guilt, among other things.

Ginny was sitting across the room from him. She was tapping her foot on the floor impatiently and diverting her eyes from contact with Draco's. He silently stood and crossed the room to where she was sitting. She was still determined not to make eye contact.

"Hey … you've been avoiding me …" Draco greeted plainly

"Avoiding you? I haven't even been thinking about you! Why would I go out of my way for someone I don't care about?" Ginny lied

"Ouch … what's your problem Virginia? I'm trying to make an effort to get to know you a bit better here and you're just shooting me down!" Draco pointed out

"My *problem* is none of your bees wax … so MYOB ASAP!" Ginny yelled the last bit, stood up and walked out of the library.

"What? MYOB …?" Draco muttered to himself, then stood up and followed the red head out the door, "Hey! Virginia!"

Ginny turned around slowly and waited for him to catch up, "Can I help you?"

"Yes actually … could you tell me what your favourite thing to do is?"

"When I'm at home … going into the muggle town and watching TV in the shop windows … at school … avoiding little ferret stalkers …"

Draco scowled at that last comment, but bit his tong and walked away. Walking away took more self control than he would have thought.

**_~*~_**

Pansy sat quietly. She was in a competitive staring competition with the little girl in the painting. Well … she was until the armour stomped its foot, sending a cloud of dust over her head, causing her to close her eyes while she sneezed.

"What are you doing in this place?!?" the girl giggled

"I'm lost … someone will come find me … I'm sure they will …" Pansy said, only half-sure of her words. The girl just shook her head, causing her curls to bounce angelically.

"I don't think so … nobody found me … well … not quick enough … I wasn't always a painting …" the girl paused in thought, "What's your name?"

"Pansy … Pansy Parkinson. What do you mean you weren't always a painting?" Pansy asked suspiciously

"Well … I wasn't always a painting." The girl said, but seeing that this didn't help elaborated, "My name is Tiffany, but call me Tiff please … I like the way it's spelt. I was a student at this school until I got trapped into this painting."

"What? How could you get trapped in a painting?" Pansy asked incredulously

"It's a long story … but I guess you have a long time," Tiff stated, concern weaved into her speech, "I'm guessing you can find this corridor if a boy has made you cry (or if your Filch) … that's what happened to all the other girls that have found me … I was just scaring you before, Filch checks here every night at 12. Anyhoozles, this guy in my year was being absolutely awful … so I ran off crying and found this place. There was a boy in the painting who told me that he was trapped and could only get out if the canvas was ripped."

"Oh … is that all I need to do to get you out?" Pansy asked and moved as if to touch the painting

"NO! DON'T EVEN MOVE!!! HEAR ME FIRST!" Tiff yelled as loud as she could, Pansy sat back on the ground and let her finish talking, "But, as soon as I touched the frame, I was sucked in the painting and the boy was thrown out. Well … by that time I was totally freaked out, the boy just turned around and told me that, if I wanted to get out again, I had to get someone else to touch the painting. Of corse, I'd never do that to anyone … so here I am, stuck here forever. Nobody to talk to … well, besides Dale …" Tiffs shoulders noticeably slumped as she motioned towards the armour.

"Oh … my … that's horrible …" Pansy felt this girl's pain, "How long have you been here so far?"

"Roughly? About 24-25 years. I don't know the exact date. I didn't think to keep track at the time." Tiff answered dully

"Well … my life's gone to shit anyways … my parents hate me … everyone in the school has hated me for the last 3 years … and the guy of my dreams has 'interests elsewhere' … so, if you want your life back, I'll be willing to give you yours, if you don't tell anyone where I am."

Tiffs eyes lit up, "Really? Are you serious?" She said, her voice hiccupping with excitement

"Yeah …" Pansy confirmed

"Are you sure?" Tiff asked concerned

Pansy answered by standing up and placing her hand on the bottom frame. It was sudden. Almost like touching a portkey, a jerking at her stomach … her navel pulling her into the painting. Then everything went white.

When her vision cleared up, Pansy saw that she was in a painted world. There was grass, a tree, sky, two doors on either side (to other paintings), and a window into the outside world. Like a magnet, she was pulled to the window to look out. Tiff was there, her eyes glinting mischievously.

"Maybe one day you'll find out what *really* happened … but right now ill tell you something, I lied for the most part … what am I saying? The only truth I told was that I've been in there for roughly 25 years. Filch isn't coming, there was no boy … and I don't think your getting out of there any time soon!" Tiff grinned, waved goodbye and started walking down the hall.

Pansy banged on the painting, yelling, screaming and, eventually, crying. Nobody would hear her. Nobody would care. She tried opening the doors, but they were locked.

It was hopeless.

The girl leant against the tree and let the emerging tears trickle down her face. The stillness of the room engulfed her. All she could hear was the rustle of her clothes whenever she moved. She slid down the tree trunk onto the grass. The grass was paint, she could tell by the way that it looked, but it didn't feel like paint … it didn't feel like anything. It was paint, but when she touched it, it didn't leave a mark on her, but if she stroked the grass it would move like normal grass would. The grass kept her distracted for a while.

**_~*~_**

Tiff strolled down the corridor; she had been waiting for this moment for a very long time. She had lived 12 years before she got trapped in the painting. She was 37 years old! ⅔ of her life was spent in that painting, now she wanted revenge. Her eyes glinted evilly. She had an aura that screamed 'Don't mess with me'. Her angelic curls fluttered behind her. She was not a force to be reckoned with.

Tiff made a bee-line towards Dumbledore's office. Once there she tapped the gargoyle on the shoulder and it moved right but of the way.

Dumbledore looked up at the girl, "You … what? How did you? Wait … where were … please, explanation …?"

Tiff's eyes started watering … her voice choked up and she wept, "I … I … I … don't know what happened, I just know I'm back …"

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**T.B.C**

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**A/N:** I have no idea where I'm going with this … DAMN YOU SALIZAR! (Ok … I watch too much Charlies Angels … I'll give you that much) I'm allergic to flames. My eyes go all red and start watering ... and yes, a boy made the boy start crying … I leave it up to your imaginations why.

I'm getting confused about what length I should make the chapters … this chapter is 1500 words in the story part (no A/N's included) I think I might try to average that … but if you would like longer chapters (the first chapter was 2072 words … I'm not going over that, it'll take too long for me to write) just say in your reviews …

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**_~The Golden Goose_**

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~MWAH!

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There is a theory which states that if ever anyone  discovers exactly what they Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable.

There is another theory which states that this has already happened ... ~Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy


	5. A Flicker of Hope

Friday, 16 January, 2004

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**_Disclaimer:_** I own stuff …

**A/N: **^-^ Yay! I updated! If you'll notice, the date at the top of the last chapter was some time in April last year … Anyhoozles … **_Nyah_**_ (if that is even your *real* name): MYOB = Mind Your Own Business!_

**Summery:** Funny how sometimes two wrongs make a right. Ginny knew that something was wrong with her family but she was too young to understand. Now, several years later, the missing link from her life visits her, but does she recognise who it is? And whom will she turn to for comfort?

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**Blades of Grass and Ladybirds**

~ A Flicker of Hope

Draco stared at Ginny from across the Great Hall. It was breakfast. Pansy still wasn't around. _'Who cares?'_

Ginny looked up from her barely-eaten food and made eye contact with Draco. Grinning bashfully she cast her eyes down to her plate again. The tension was thick enough to cut with a knife. Ginny groaned inwardly at the sight of food on her plate. It made her feel sick … again. The girl nearly leapt from her seat and made a quick exit. She knew she should eat … but she couldn't bring herself to do it.

There was still an hour before classes commenced, so Ginny decided to wander the halls aimlessly, sticking to the most familiar paintings and tapestries. All she could hear was her quiet breathing and light footsteps. Suddenly, she lost her vision completely … she got extremely dizzy and fell to her knees. She tried to get to her feet but it just made her feel even fainter. All Ginny could hear was her quite breathing turn into loud panting, and then go so light that she didn't think she was breathing at all. And finally, she lost consciousness completely.

**_~*~_**

Draco watched Ginny as she left the great hall and felt a pang of disappointment in the pit of his stomach. This feeling was new to him, so he didn't associate it with Ginny's departure. He just assumed it was his loss of appetite at seeing Vincent drink an entire glass of pumpkin juice through a straw stuck in his nose. He watched the spectacle for a few minutes before turning his attention towards Dumbledore, who had stood and cleared his throat to grab the attention of the students eating around him.

"Students … yesterday afternoon an event of the most peculiar kind happened … an ex-student appeared on the school grounds. While it baffles me how this happened, I have decided that she will pick up classes where she left off and in the house that she was in when she attended Hogwarts last. May I introduce Tiffany Meliflua … She will be joining Slytherin house in the third year …" Dumbledore said these words with a serious tone and a slight hint of disappointment that was barely noticeable behind the firm words. Tiff stepped out from behind the headmaster and scanned the room. All the students were watching her, examining with curiosity in their eyes and vacant expressions on their faces. Tiff got suddenly very self-conscious and felt the desire to get away from the violating stares. She made her way quickly to the Slytherin table and sat. The quiet murmuring of breakfast talk started again and Tiff, realising that she hadn't eaten in 25 years, started on some bacon and scrambled eggs.

Once she finished her breakfast, Tiff scanned the table for potential friends. About three places down from her a boy was drinking a glass of pumpkin juice from a straw stuck in his nose … but that wasn't who she was looking at … directly across from the boy was another boy … a boy who looked exactly like her cousin and best friend … Lucias Malfoy …

Momentarily, Tiff was in his mind … and in the split second she was there she got a name, 'Ginny Weasley' … '_Time to cause some trouble …'_

**_~*~_**

Since Ginny was wandering the more commonly used halls, it took only till classes started for her unconscious form to be discovered by a group of first year Hufflepuffs. She was taken directly to the infirmary where she recovered within the hour.

"Now Ginny …" Madame Pomfrey started, treading lightly in case she hit a nerve, "While you were unconscious we conducted some tests to see if we could find some answers to your passing out in the halls, Kay? … And we found that you're extremely malnourished … Ginny? I'd like to know if you've been eating properly … Kay?"

"Well … no … not really … but I haven't been doing it on purpose! I just … haven't been hungry lately …" Ginny answered honestly

"And …" the nurse, accepting this answer, started again, "We were informed by one of the students that she walked in on you in the bathroom … and you were cutting yourself … Kay?"

"WHAT?!?" Ginny's jaw dropped to her chest. She hadn't been cutting herself! "I haven't been cutting myself! Whoever said that … she's a liar!"

"Now Ginny … did I say it was a girl? So it must be true because you knew that fact … but if you don't tell the truth now I'm going to have to take this to someone of more authority and eventually even tell you're parents … Kay?"

A million and one things were running through her head … Hadn't Madame Pomfrey told her that she was walked in on in the bathroom … so she had just assumed it was a female … but who would do something like that? Ginny knew that she was a social cripple … but she didn't think that anyone actually disliked her enough to deceive people like this in a personal stab at her being. With all this going through her head she decided that there was no way of convincing the nurse of her innocence in this situation … so she may as well admit to the crime before her parents were involved.

"OK … I cut myself … can I please go now?"

"Oh no, no, no! You must stay for counselling!"

Ginny groaned inwardly again … this was going to be painful! Whoever did this was going to be hunted down and firmly beaten!

The nurse sat on her bed and prepared for a long conversation. The infirmary was completely empty besides the two on the bed and the permanently invisible people that nobody can see or hear having their weekly meeting under the bed next to Ginny's. The girl sighed in frustration and watched a ladybird crawl up the wall next to Madame Pomfrey.

"Now Ginny …" the nurse started again, "What's making you feel like you have to hurt yourself? A few of the staff members have noticed that you don't really have any friends … Kay?"

Ginny was tempted to bring up her best friend, Sophia … but then decided against it, talking to peanuts wasn't going to help her case … instead she said, "Draco Malfoy … I consider him my friend."

**_~*~_**

After Ginny was finally allowed to leave the infirmary she was embarrassed beyond anything else … Madame Pomfrey had found it quite hard to believe that Ginny and Draco considered each other friends, so she had pulled Draco out of class for him to confirm it. Luckily he had covered for her … but now it was lunch and he was insisting on walking her down there.

"So … What was that all about?" Draco asked

"I have no idea … someone had told Madame Pomfrey that I cut myself, and she said that she'd tell my parents if I didn't admit to it … so I admitted to it …" Ginny answered

"You don't … do you?" Draco asked, unsure, he glanced quickly at her arms. Ginny, seeing the glance, showed him her arms, the smooth, milky skin was unmarked, except a burn scar across her wrist … most likely from an oven. Draco breathed out in relief at seeing her smooth skin.

"Thankyou for covering for me … its made things a lot less worse … I'm going to lunch now" Ginny said, wanting to get away as fast as possible.

"Hey, Ginny, wait up … we get along right?" Draco pointed out, placing his hand on her shoulder, "Maybe we could spend a bit more time together?"

Ginny glared at his hand on her shoulder before shrugging it off, "I don't think so, Malfoy, I don't think it wise to mingle." She spat his last name like it was a curse word, she was not in the mood to be polite, and there was the habit of being rude to him for the last 5 years that she had yet to break.

Draco was speechless and wounded at her insulting use of his last name. He watched her back retreat longingly. _'You'll be mine'_

She was just more of a challenge now. And Draco liked that.

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**T.B.C**

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**A/N:** I think I know where this is finally going … it's a sad ending … if anyone wants to see everything work out for the better, just tell me and I wont make it sad … but even though the ending is a long way off, I still have to build up events … so, after this chapter, if nobody says they want a happy ending its gonna be *really* tragic! And I realise the Draco is very OOC … but this is *my* Draco and he'll feel however he wants!

And Madame Pomfrey has magically turned into my school counsellor who says 'Now Hailey …' at the beginning of every sentence and 'Kay?' at the end!

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**_~The Golden Goose_**

~MWAH!

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**_Song to describe how I'm feeling today:_**

_It's a broke day_

_But everything is ok!_

_I'm up all night_

_But everything is alright!_

_Been a rough week_

_And I don't get enough sleep!_

_Been a long year_

_Pretending I belong here …_

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**_~ 'It's OK' – Eminem (Infinite)_**


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